This parent profile was originally published on Gays with Kids
Bent-Einar, who lives in Norway, had always wanted to be a father. He admits that as a single guy, the thought of starting a family alone was difficult, because what you’d always hear is that a child needs both a mother and a father.
But his desire to be a dad far outweighed the preconceived notions of what was considered “family”, so he began his research on surrogacy. Thanks to Circle Surrogacy, he is the proud Dad to a beautiful daughter, who makes his life complete.
Here, Bent-Einar tells his story.
“It took years before I signed on with a surrogacy agency.” I have always wanted to be a father. I am very family-oriented, and imagined having a family myself. I started to research surrogacy. I was interested in the ethical and moral sides of the process.
In the beginning, I was hesitant with the idea of using a surrogate mother. So I started to read more about surrogacy, mainly about why women become surrogates. I wanted to better understand what motivated them to carry a baby for someone else. I wasn’t looking for a woman who was doing this for money. I wanted a to find a woman who really wanted to help someone in my situation.
I discussed the idea of surrogacy with female friends in Norway. When I mentioned my thoughts on the motivation behind a woman wanting to be a surrogate, my friends said, “If it was legal in Norway, I would do it. I was so happy when I was pregnant! I enjoying being pregnant, I would do it for someone else.”
It took almost 3 years of research and contemplation before I started thinking this was a good idea, mostly because I was single. I thought it would be easier to be two parents versus a single parent. I sat down with my family and explained to them what I was feeling, and they basically told me that women have been single mothers for thousands of years! If they could do it, than I would be able to raise a child on my own, too.
My meeting with Circle Surrogacy went well. I met with Dean (lawyer) and Brett (parent associate and gay dad through surrogacy). I wasn’t sure what to expect; the culture between the US and Norway is different, but when I met with Dean and Brett, they were both laid back and I immediately felt comfortable talking to them and sharing my story.
After the consult, I decided the very next day I wanted to sign on; I was older and I didn’t want to waste any more time!