Finding a Surrogate Mother: The Process for Parents

find a surrogate

Are you ready to find a surrogate and embark on your surrogacy journey? To give you a clear picture of what the process of finding a surrogate mother entails we’ve compiled the 5 steps about finding and matching with a surrogate for intended parents.

How to Find A Surrogate Mother

Step #1: Research surrogacy agencies.

Most intended parents start their journey by researching agencies to find those that best suit what you’re looking for. The best next step after research is sitting down for a complimentary consultation. At Circle, you’ll meet with our staff by Skype or in person and learn about the programs and options available, the detailed process of matching with a surrogate, the legal process, any insurance issues, the financial implications, and basic medical information. Prior to your consultation, you’ll complete a basic questionnaire and submit photographs that assist our team in tailoring our services to meet your needs, and helps us find you a surrogate match.

Step #2: Understand the screening and selection process for a surrogate.

How does a woman become a surrogate? First, women must apply with Circle Surrogacy to see if they qualify. Once they apply and their initial application is accepted, prospective surrogates will undergo a mental health screening. A typical screening process involves an extensive medical and psychological assessment as well as thorough criminal and financial background checks.

Step #3: Match with your surrogate. During your consult and after you sign on, you’ll be asked questions about your expectations from the journey, your views on selective reduction and geographic preferences; as well as questions about your views on family, etc to help give us an idea of who you are as a person. Our surrogates are asked similar questions in their application process. Circle will then review your matching preferences as well as those of qualified and screened surrogates to see who would be a good match for you. We base our parent/surrogate matches on the following criteria:

  • Legal fit (you are both geographically located in areas that allow for you to have the smoothest journey possible from a legal perspective)
  • Personality fit (your expectations of a surrogacy journey, ideas on the level of communication desired and views on termination are similar)

Our matching manager has been matching intended parents and surrogates for many years – she’s truly amazing at her job! legal needs, we facilitate introductions between the intended parents and the surrogate. This is initially done through profiles, and then by phone or Skype before you meet in person.

Step #4: Have and initial meeting.

Once a good surrogate match has been determined, profiles will be exchanged between you and your potential surrogate. If both parties agree they’d like to meet, Circle helps set up an initial Skype call. Circle is not part of this call, as it is a chance for you and your potential surrogate to get to know each other. What should you talk about on that first call with your surrogate? Anything and everything! This blog post details some easy topics to get the conversation started. If, after the call, you both would like to work together, you will be officially matched!

Step #5: Build a relationship over time.

Like any friendship, building a relationship with your surrogate takes time. In the beginning, you’ll still be getting to know each other, learning about each other families, lives outside of the surrogacy journey, and the types of activities and hobbies you both enjoy doing. As your surrogacy journey progresses, so will your relationship. We have found that the more open and honest you are with your surrogate early on, the stronger your relationship will be. If you’d like to hear about the pregnancy in great detail, tell her! If there are certain appointments you’d like to be part of, try and arrange that together. Preferences on the birth? Discuss it! You are sharing one of life’s most monumental journeys together – you should both be ‘all in’ emotionally.

If you’re ready to embark on a surrogacy journey to grow your family, fill out this short form. By sharing a little information with us, we can help you find a surrogate and support you on your path to parenthood!