Surrogacy is a huge decision, not to be taken lightly. But it’s a decision that changed my life, the lives of the people that I had children for, and my children’s lives.
Having said that, how did I come to this decision?
Well, interestingly, I was looking on Craigslist for someone to do my yard work, and ran across an ad for egg donors. I thought, “wow, that would be cool.” The opportunity to help people have children that could not, for medical or relationship dynamic reasons, felt almost like a calling.
From there, I researched all of it: donating my eggs, surrogacy, etc. A surrogate forum made me come to the final decision. I read through ad after ad— people that couldn’t conceive, gay couples, straight couples, single people, all with their own reasons for wanting a child. It blew me away that something that came so ‘easily’ to me (and I didn’t want kids but was blessed with them), wouldn’t happen for people that would likely sell a limb to have a child. I couldn’t believe how unappreciative I was for what I had: my two kids that I took for granted when you look at it in that context. We are closer than ever because of our experience in surrogacy.
So, I found Circle, in my research. I liked Circle because unlike the other agencies I had contacted for information, they didn’t seem like pushy car sales people. No, I don’t work for the agency. But, after four surrogacies, all through Circle, I can say that I’m happy with the choice that I made.
I’ve always worked full time and made decent money so the choice wasn’t financial. It was, in part, a choice to have a connection to people, even if temporary. Of course, it was the idea of what a footprint I could leave in someone’s life, if it actually worked. Imagine my surprise, when it did work, four times.
From there, the relationships that you gain and the experience and appreciation that you have, just changes with each step of the process, all the way through birth and the relationships since. What I gained the most, was an appreciation for my own kids. When you’re involved in a ‘world’ where people cannot have children, it’s an eye opening moment for you, as a parent.
Granted, not all of my couples are in touch the same amount, as I left it up to them what they felt comfortable with. But, knowing that my life changed, along with theirs makes me feel like I did something that mattered, not just for them but for myself and my kids.
The decision, again, isn’t to be taken lightly but know going in that you’re not just changing their lives, you are changing your own life (not just because you’re going to gain weight). They are pounds well worth it!
If you are a surrogate, parent, or egg donor, and would like to contribute to the Circle blog, send us an email!